If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
