wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
