I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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