I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Randomize