I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Randomize
