I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
