I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
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