THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
