sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
