belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Randomize
