oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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