Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I am mentally ready for anal.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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