he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
