Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying

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(636): View more from Missouri

Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.

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(925): View more from California

tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan

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(209): View more from California

I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.

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(647): View more from Ontario

Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"

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(314): View more from Missouri

Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine

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(915): View more from Texas

I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover

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