Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
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