Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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