we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Randomize
