i just had sex bonerless
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I am naked and annoyed.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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