Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
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