champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Alive.
So much puke
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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