what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize
