My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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