Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
