worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
