Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
