I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
