Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
