She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
