We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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