problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
