You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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