What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Randomize
