Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I just cut my nipple shaving
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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