so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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