office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
