I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Just invented taco cereal.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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