yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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