But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
