Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize