Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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