is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
