Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
