At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
