I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
