Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
A+ Viking dick
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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