What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Randomize
