I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
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