ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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