Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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