Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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